Depression is the worst thing in the world. It’s such a vicious cycle. I’m having one of those days where I can’t even bring myself to get out of bed. Which only leads me to hating myself more, because I should be out doing something. I should go see my Dad, or get some study done, or clean the house, or go visit my second family… I just can’t find the will to get up and actually do something. And that’s something I hate. Which puts me right back in square one.

I hate this feeling, and I don’t know what to do about it. I don’t even know who to talk to or if it’s worth even trying to talk to someone.

Oh God I miss Tumblr.
Hopefully moving in to the new place with the boys + Sarah soon, then I can use the amazing internet here. :D 

Anonymous asked: Do you have a straight fringe coz someone awesome suggested it?

Yes I do! :) My friend Ryan!

14 day challenge is going on hold for a bit, my internet is shaaaaaped ( and there is no way I’m gonna try and get on Tumblr at dial-up speed (‘cause fuck that)). So yeah, I’ll be back in two weeks guys :D

Day 5: Who are your celebrity crushes?

Ah! So many. Christian Bale, Matt King, William Beckett, Russell Brand, Travvie McCoy, Serge Pizzorno, etc etc C: I’m just gonna stop there because there are so many that I could list but I just can’t think of any more. D:

Day 4: Explain what you were doing with your life one year ago.

This time last year, I was just starting to come out of a stage in my life at which I did nothing but smoke pot, bludge out at school, push all my friends away, and spend all my money on alcohol. I was, however, dating a lovely girl who I am still friends with now.

Day 3: Tell us 10 of your pet peeves.

1. People who do nothing but complain. I mean, I know I complain a lot myself, but really, if you just sit at home and complain to twitter/facebook/tumblr about any and every aspect of your life, there’s a problem.
2. People who can’t take on any responsibility on for themselves. Here’s the thing, I’m fine if some days you just can’t be bothered doing things you know you have to, but when you start to shirk your responsibilities every single day and then blame me for it? That’s when you’re just not trying hard enough.
3. People who can’t respect my opinions. For example, I’m totally cool with you hating my favourite band… But don’t ever go and tell me they’re “shit”, just because you don’t like them. That doesn’t make them shit, and gives you no right to go and bag me out for it. That’s just dickish.
4. People who are always condescending. Basically, someone needs to slap you in the face with the realisation that, no, you do not know everything and you are not God’s greatest gift to planet Earth. Fuck you, never ever belittle someone just to make yourself feel good.
5. Fandoms in the music industry. Not because they are comprised of mainly early teenage girls (let’s face it, we all did it at one point…), but because everyone is just so damned bitchy and gets all angry and defensive so easily. Calm your tits guys, the band are humans too, they don’t want you arguing over little things.
6. Girls who can’t leave their past relationships alone, and proceed to spend the few months to a year just doing things to try and “get back” at their ex-boyfriend. Seriously, I don’t see the point; can you just grow up already?
7. People who cannot stay the fuck out of other people’s relationships (and friendships) - ie, almost everyone in Tamworth. It’s none of anyone’s business as to how my relationship works, why it ends or the things that may or may not have happened during the relationship.
8. People who go looking for trouble. Honestly, I understand not liking someone. I understand wanting to not spend any time with them because you don’t like them. That makes sense. But fuck me dead, stop trying to threaten them or rile them up. It really does just make you look like an idiot.
9. People who treat me like I am unable to function like a normal human being since my mother passed away and because I now see a psychiatrist. It didn’t change who I am, the entire ordeal has, and continues to, make me stronger; treating me differently just because I have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder/Anxiety/Depression only makes it worse.
10. People who just generally have no respect for others. For example: make sure you pay your rent, don’t be stingy, don’t continually ask someone for lifts just because they have a car, don’t ever expect anyone to do anything for you.

Day 2: Tell us your top 7 favourite bands/musicians - include a favourite song by each. 

These aren’t really in any order, because, well, I love them all! They are also subject to change at any time because I get bored of the music I listen to a lot.

• Asking Alexandria
  - I Used To Have A Best Friend (Then He Gave Me An STD)
• Kasabian
  - (you know how they did a cover of Del Shannon’s “Runaway”? Am I allowed to say that? No? Okay…) Black Whistler. 
• Pierce the Veil
  - Kissing In Cars 
• A Day To Remember
  - Monument 
• Brand New
  - Untitled 4 OR Jude Law and A Semester abroad (I really can’t choose…) 
• Ellington
  - Wide Awake And Smiling 
• The Vaine
  - March of Bastille 

Day 1: introduce yourself - include a picture!

Hi there! If you’re reading this, you’re probably already following me, so you probably already know my name (for those of you playing at home, it’s Amy Devrell). I’m 17 years old and I live in the ~*~country music capital of Australia~*~, Tamworth. It’s not the greatest place in the world, but I’m (hopefully/more than likely) moving to Sydney in the new year and I’m going to miss it.

If there’s anything you should know about me, it’s that I’m a big Repo! The Genetic Opera, Spirited (the Aussie tv show) and MotoGP fan. And the tv series Misfits, too. This blog is pretty much made of entirely those things, some stuff from my favourite bands, and a fair few personal posts, ‘cause, well, fuck you - it’s my blog, and I will use it as my dumping ground.

I swear like a sailor, am not fashionable in the least, and am usually your average optimist (except for on here, because everyone needs a break from being strong sometimes :)). I have the greatest best friends in the world, and I am thankful every day that I have them - because they have gotten me through nightmares most people my age couldn’t even imagine.

Anyway, I suck at introducing myself, so if you’ve even bothered reading this at all, you can head over to my ask box to ask me anything I’ve missed!

1. Introduce yourself - include a picture!
2. Tell us your top 7 favourite bands/musicians - include a favourite song by each.
3. Tell us 10 of your pet peeves.
4. Explain what you were doing with your life one year ago.
5. Who are your celebrity crushes?
6. Take a photo of your favourite quote written in your own handwriting.
7. Name 15 things that are in your bedroom.
8. 8 turn ons and 6 turn offs.
9. Tell us about one of your favourite memories and why it means so much to you.
10. What are 4 of your favourite movies?
11. Name your favourite iPod/phone apps.
12. Favourite gaming console, kgo.
13. Tell us about your best friends.
14. Write a letter to yourself one year from now.